It was my freshman year at Central Christian College of the Bible (CCCB) in Moberly, Missouri. It was the first couple months of school and I was already getting a little socially bored. I felt a bit out of place in that I had a different “history” then most of the students there. However I wasn’t alone. There were five of us from Knoxville and I had my songwriting buddy, Tony Beaverson. Still, I was trying to “play nice,” but sometimes you just have to make things interesting.
A group of us (a dozen or so) were in the 2nd floor lounge of the main building. People were just talking and cutting-up. There was a TV in the corner and the news was on. It was a story about “asbestos.” This was 1981 and scientists were just discovering the health hazards of asbestos. The sound was turned down low so you couldn’t quite hear everything the reporters were saying. A very pretty (and yes, blond) girl sitting next to me asked, “What are they talking about on the news?”
I couldn’t resist.
I replied, “For years big buildings have had a naturally growing fungus under the floors, ceilings, and walls called ‘asbestos’. It acts as a natural fire retardant, so builders have always just left it, however, they are now discovering that it causes near-sightedness and abnormal facial hair growth in those who work near it. Victims also develop an inability to wear their hats straight.” Sure enough, as I’m talking there is news footage of guys with their hardhats askew on their heads pointing at asbestos under big industrial concrete floors and on big concrete walls, and yes, everyone they interviewed had a beard and glasses.
“Huh?” the girl replied, “I think I’ve heard something about that.” Then she went on talking to whoever she was with.
Later Tony says to me, “What were you saying about that asbestos thing?”
Me, “Oh, I was just having a little fun with someone who really didn’t want to know about asbestos and who really wasn’t listening to my answer anyway.”
Tony, “Yeah…cause that was kind of weird all those guys had the glasses and beards.”
Just lucky I guess.
(I hope that girl got on Jeopardy and sub-consciously referenced my misinformation into a bizarre response to one of the answers/questions.)
chris
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