Wednesday, November 30, 2011

My Adventures @The King’s Daughters’ School: My First Semester

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To reiterate: KDS is a Level-II, Dual-Diagnosis, residential school located in Columbia, TN for students 8 to 21 years of age and adults who have been identified with Mental Retardation and who may have a secondary mental health diagnosis or other behavioral concerns that require 24-hour care and structure.

I started teaching at KDS January 3rd, 1989.  My primary subjects were Reading, Written Language, & Spelling.  I had six, 50 minute classes a day, plus PE, plus lunchroom duty.  Planning was done before or after school and on-the-fly throughout the day.

At KDS there were multiple programs:

>The Early Learning Program was birth to 4-year-olds.  These were students from the county and came for classes 3 days a week.
>We had an elementary self-contained class for students 8 to 11-years-olds.
>We had two middle school/high school class that had students 12 to 18-years-old.
>There was a pre-vocational class that worked on job skills,
> A full vocational sheltered workshop that students aged 16 to adult worked either full or ½ days.
>We had two self-contained rooms for individuals with severe and profound disabilities.

KDS also had four on-campus residences for children and adolescents and two off-campus residences for adults.

My focus was on the middle & high school aged students.

I felt like I had learned my lessons (the hard way) at my previous school.  So I was determined to be highly structured, very proactive, and consistent to the point of near inflexibility when it came to behavior.  Ninety % of the students came from the KDS residences and the other 10% came from a nearby group home. I soon discovered that 24-hour structure for the students made my job so much easier.  It is amazing what happens when a kid eats good healthy food every day, sleeps in a warm bed (inside) at night, actually attends school, and is not physically or sexually abused.  At times we looked like miracle workers (which we were) but the miracle was not all that complicated.

Another thing I picked-up was the concept of being a family with the students.  Many of them had come from horrendous circumstances.  There was a low possibility that they would return home anytime soon (or at all) and they were more likely to live with us for a number of years.  Some of the adults in our program who were in their 40’s and 50’s had lived at KDS since they were teenagers.  It was essential for those children’s development that they received actual love from adults, not just clinically detached treatment.  They needed appropriate physical touch.  They needed joy and sorrow and disappointment and frustration from us.  They needed many mothers and fathers in their lives to undo all the hurt, neglect, and damage done in the past and to replace it with something they could be confident and secure.  There was a lot of emotional risk involved for the staff.  Many of the staff crashed and burned because they themselves had so much buried hurt in their own hearts, they had nothing left to give.

I was reminded of a geography lesson in my “History of Israel” class in Bible College.  The Jordan River runs into the Sea of Galilee.  The Sea of Galilee is Israel’s largest fresh-water lake.  It is teeming with fish and provides a livelihood for all who live near it.  It provides life.  The Jordan River then flows from the Sea of Galilee south eventually ending into the Dead Sea.

The Dead Sea is one of the saltiest hypersaline lakes in the world.  It is 8.6 times saltier than the ocean.  No life can be sustained in that lake.  The bottoms of boats are eaten away by the Dead Sea.  All of the fresh water that pours into the lake is eventually turned salty and useless.  The Dead Sea has no outlet.  It is one of the lowest points on the surface of the earth, 1388 feet below sea level with a depth of 1,237 feet.  There is no place for the water to flow.  It just collects and becomes stagnant.

Without The Lord pouring life into me, I would have had nothing to give.  I had a shallow pool of human goodness that was quickly drained at my previous school.  I was desperate. I was forced to rely on His strength flowing into me so I had something to give out to the kids.  The end result was that I was no longer stagnant, but fresh.  Fresh water flowed in and flowed out and the pool of my heart was cleansed.  It really helped me is so many areas away from school.

It was a quick five months, then the end of the semester came.  The school offered me a raise and I signed on for the next school year.

I had found a home.

chris

(Tomorrow, two funny stories)

www.tkds.org

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Be careful what you text.

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Ok. I admit it. Some of these blogs I just sit down and start typing stuff that comes into my head.  But some of them I actually work on over time because I want to process through my memories and write something accurate.  Those entries that I write “on-purpose” may take a number of days to get through. In the mean time I fill-in with spontaneous rattle-trap.

All this is to say, I’ve misplaced my data stick.  It has something I’ve been working on about my first semester at The King’s Daughters’ School.  So until I find it, I’m stalled about KDS.

So…..

Here’s a true story:

In the midst of all the Penn State/Sandusky/Paterno/Abuse/Cover-up discussions a week ago, this happened. On a radio call-in show here in KC there was a discussion of how Sandusky ’s victims must feel about their abuse now that they are adults. This discussion then turned to a general discussion of the affects of childhood sexual abuse on adult men years after their abuse, especially if it has gone unreported. (Most sexual abuse, especially abuse against males, goes unreported.) The call-in show also routinely takes texts and those texts are read on the air.

One regular text-er to this particular radio show had an anonymous “tag.” (like “Wildcat”)  Wildcat had been sexually abused by an uncle when he was a child and had never reported it.  On this particular day, however, he disclosed his abuse anonymously in a text to the radio call-in show.

“FROM WILDCAT: I was sexually abused by my uncle when I was a young boy.  I am an adult now and I turned out alright.”

However, it never actually sent it to the radio show.

He inadvertently posted it to Facebook as his status.

Within minutes he discovered his error and deleted it, but it was too late.  His aunt had seen it and had already sent him a message, “I am so so sorry!”

Do you think there were some interesting discussions around the ole’ Thanksgiving table at Wildcat’s parents’ house this past weekend.

chris

Monday, November 28, 2011

MY 100TH BLOG!

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I started writing on a (mostly) daily basis 100 days ago and there is one question burning in my mnid right now:

Who is the person in Russia who reads this?

I get hits from Russia every day, although now that I mention it, it'll probably stop.

Is it just one person or random people who stumble upon this blog, read it once, and never read it again?  Why would someone from Russia want to read my self absorbed drivel?

It it a person from America that lives in Russia?  Did someone lose a bet:

(Read the following with a stereotypical Russian accent in your head)

Russian Dude #1: HEY ANTON, WHOEVER PASSES OUT FIRST AFTER DRINKING THIS GALLON OF VODKA HAS TO READ THIS STUPID AMERICAN BLOG FOR A YEAR.

Russian Dude #2: YOU'RE ON YURI!

(I officially apologize to all Russians for my insensitive suggestion that all Russians drink a lot of Vodka.  If it is any consolation Nochnoy dozor and  Dnevnoy dozor are two of my favorite movies.  I wish Timur Bekmambetov would make the third one, but alas, Hollywood has corrupted him.)

Do people in Russia have mid-life crisiseseses?

Do people in Russia have the internet? (again, sorry Russians)

What could I possibly be saying to the one dude in Russia that keeps him reading?

But then again, I could say that about the dudes in the US.

So whatever it is Russian dude, KEEP READING!

chris

To learn more about the movie Night Watch (Nochnoy dozor):
 www.foxsearchlight.com/nwnd

To learn more about the movie Day Watch (Dnevnoy dozor): 
www.foxsearchlight.com/daywatch/

To learn more about Vodka:
www.russianstandardvodka.com/#/en/


Sunday, November 27, 2011

I dis "Twilight."

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There are many reasons why the "Twilight" series of books and movies suck:

>Bad writing
>Bad acting
>Bad movie making

...just to name a few.

However; there is an insidious and dangerous message embedded in the premise of the stories that I would not allow my daughter (if I had one) to embrace.

In the book and movie Edward describes himself as "the ultimate predator."  He has a great desire to devour others.  He kind of knows it's bad (to suck others dry) but his very nature fights against him.

Bella is fascinated by this and believes her love will change or at least maintain Edward's uneasy truce within himself. "I'm not afraid of you," she tells him at one point.  "You won't hurt me."

In real life predators hurt people. A woman's love does not change an abusive predator.  He will poison that love and slowly crush the woman's heart with the pendulum of hurt, apologize, hurt, promise, hurt, apologize...

The fantasy that is being propagated is hurtful and dangerous.

Yes, I know this probably won't effect most girls, but it will affect some.

I worked with many men who were in prison for crimes against women.  They were smooth talkers and knew how to woo the affections of a woman and then twist it.

The love of our lives was meant to be Jesus.  He's not dangerous.  He is the protector and defender of our hearts.  he comes and gives up His life for us.

He is our Romance.

chris

Saturday, November 26, 2011

I went into the attic...

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In Newton, Iowa we had a beautiful Victorian home we had renovated into a showplace.  From the first week of November through the first week of January it was arrayed with Christmas paraphernalia..and not inflatable trashy crap either.

When we moved to Grandview we bought a very plain house.  It meets our needs, but it's not (nor ever should be) a showplace.  I have put minimal effort into decorating our house for the past five Christmases.

This year, for some reason, I wanted to put up more.  That meant getting into our attic and rummaging around in the multiple Christmas boxes.  In Newton we had two palates stacked with stuff.  Now we have about 10 boxes.

As I sorted through stuff and took inventory I was flooded with memories of past Christmases.  Some of them made me grin, others made me cry.  I was surprised at reaction and it gave me insight into why I had avoided those decorations for so long.

In the attics of our hearts I guess we also have boxes of stuff we avoid looking at. They spark memories, and for me, they beckon and demand action, sometimes painful action.

I like to think my little self-absorbed blog gave me the courage to get into the attic.  I am so happy I brought out what I did.  The garland and nativities are beautiful.  It has motivated me to pull out even more in the future.

I hope it motivates me to pull out even more stuff from my heart.

chris

Friday, November 25, 2011

I cooked a turkey.

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Today is "Black Friday."  But here at the Geil Acres in Grandview it's going to be our Thanksgiving meal day.  Yesterday to eat we had chili and cheesy potato soup, corn bread, cookies, and pineapple upside-down cake.  Today will be the traditional turkey, ham, dressing, green bean casserole, rolls, mashed potatoes, veggies, and pumpkin pie.

We have lots of people: Amy' Mom from Tuscon (Charese), Amy's sister and her family (Rory, Molly, Shelby, Shelby's fiance' Derrik, Emma, Jacob, Katie, Ben, & Chloe.) All of our family is here (Me, Amy, Eric, Jaron, Wesley, & Christian) and our honorary son Luke and his wife Stephanie (who is 8 months pregnant) are here.  We are also looking forward to Megan & Rana this afternoon for a grand total of 20 to feed.

Many of the kids went to the "Black Friday" sale at Target at Midnight.  Jaron and Wesley had sved there money an had even scoped out a gameplan to get thier "Xbox" paraphernalia.  We all stayed up until ab out 4 am.

It is good to have Eric Home.  He went immediately to the boy's room and I didn't see him for a while.  It was fun for all of us to stay up and talk.

I don'r have any pearls of wisdom or insight.  I just am having such a satisfying time with everyone around me and the goal of getting heinously stuffed with food.

It will happen.

chris

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Thankfulness

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Psalm 138 (The Message)
A David Psalm
 1-3 Thank you! Everything in me says "Thank you!" Angels listen as I sing my thanks.
   I kneel in worship facing your holy temple
      and say it again: "Thank you!"
   Thank you for your love,
      thank you for your faithfulness;
   Most holy is your name,
      most holy is your Word.
   The moment I called out, you stepped in;
      you made my life large with strength.

 4-6 When they hear what you have to say, God,
      all earth's kings will say "Thank you."
   They'll sing of what you've done:
      "How great the glory of God!"
   And here's why: God, high above, sees far below;
      no matter the distance, he knows everything about us.

 7-8 When I walk into the thick of trouble,
      keep me alive in the angry turmoil.
   With one hand
      strike my foes,
   With your other hand
      save me.
   Finish what you started in me, God.
      Your love is eternal—don't quit on me now


chris

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Blogging? Schmallogging!

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Eric got home from Cincinnati this evening, so, no extensive blogging for me.

But in case you missed it...

Enjoy Eric as The Beast, March 2009:

CLICK THE YOU TUBE LINK
http://youtu.be/lXXiWR0ekSI